look no pants
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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