Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my mouth tastes like poor choices
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize