It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
