another moral hangover. fuck.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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