She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
