sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
