The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Sober January is a disaster.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there