She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie