brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.