Did you just see the Batmobile???
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
i need some magic done to my vagina
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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