Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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