So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
