i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize