yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
