i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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