moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
im holly from the hills drunk
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
