so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
