What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
