goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.