After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
