R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
