If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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