if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize