you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
