just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize