So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
