i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize