How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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