So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
