Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
