We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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