Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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