I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
