Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
