whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
