If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
How's work?
Spinning.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
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