i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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