My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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