Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
