2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
