I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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