Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
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You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
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Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
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