My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
