I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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