ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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