Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize