sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
