She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
