I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Randomize
