and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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