Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
