Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize